Conservative, you say?

So one Rush Limbaugh was a big hit yesterday at the Conservative Political Action Conference. He topped off a conference who's purpose seemed to be to reenergize a political party who's still feeling the effects of the severe ass-whoopin they received last November.

The man plays to his crowd well. Hell, many points of his speech - and the little news tickers that followed - were matters upon which I myself strongly agree: thick, liberal application of Constitutional law, reduced government and government intrusion, and individual liberty. You know, the things that our forefathers had in mind right after the Great British Bitchslap.

It was then that I realized that something wasn't quite right. The three points that I listed are not the stand of the Republican Party. At least, not if you consider the Bill of Rights as part of the Constitution. Reduced .gov intrusion? How's that War on Drugs going for ya? And we all know that neither Ass nor Elephant truly believes in individual liberty when it comes to Things They Don't Like.

I'm sorry, Mr. Limbaugh, but you are playing cards that are not in your hand. Those beliefs are steadfast to a political party, yes, but it is neither of the two parties that politicos refer to in the word "bipartisan".

No, those are the cornerstones of Libertarians. Yes, it would seem right now that those who truly hold fast to the kind of freedom codified by the Framers would appear as a polar opposite to those who have the White House and the vast majorities of both houses of Congress. But, you cannot go all William Wallace and start screaming Freedom while your guts are getting ripped out by your enemies just because it sounds good. You gotta believe that shit, brother. And if you did? This would look a whole lot different:

See, this little jewel right here shows one of the results of the straw poll at CPAC this year. This one shows who CPAC attendees pick for the next presidential candidate. The Chairman recognizes Mr. Kloos:

When the former governor of Massa-fuckin’-chusetts, the blow-dried RINO Mitt Romney, is your pick for standard bearer of the conservative cause, you can pretty much count on getting your balls kicked all the way up to your ears in the next mid-term and Presidential elections.

Yeah, let's get all fired-up and conservative again, and then put RINOs and creationalist moonbats at the top of our list! Clearly, none of these morons are familiar with what the Commonwealth of Massachusettes was like under the divinely conservative leadership of one Mitt Romney. Jay G, care to chime in here?

And here, I was holding out hope for the 2010 mid-terms. Now I'm not so sure.

Conservatives and Republicans, listen closely. Put down everything and pay attention, because this could not be more crucial than it is right now. And don't take my word for it, because your favorite radio blowhard nailed it right out of the park (just in time for your straw poll results came in, which should have taken the wind right out of his sails). From CNN:

Looking ahead to the 2012 election, Limbaugh said conservatives will have to choose the right candidate to take the country back.

Truer words, y'all. Truer words.

And as is par for the course, libertarians are going to get hung out to dry no matter who's in office. This time, though, they're playing our fight song...